10 steps to chill

Realize It’s OK to Be Stressed
No one is ever happy all the time. As a society we tend to want to hide negative feelings and pretend we’re fine. Especially with social media being as prevalent as it is today, it seems like everyone else has the perfect life. Underneath it all, though, we all struggle. We all have responsibilities, we all get overwhelmed, we all have internal struggles. The sooner you realize it’s OK to feel stressed, the sooner you can start relaxing.

It’s Also OK to Relax
This may seem obvious due to the title, but it’s OK to relax and let go of worries. When things are bad in the world and people are suffering, a lot of us feel bad for taking some time to ourselves. After all, how are we supposed to be enjoying ourselves while everyone else is grieving?

Ask yourself this: Is your worrying or stressing helping anyone or anything? If not, what’s the downside of being able to calm yourself down? It may sound a little harsh, but less people stressing out helps calm the environment.

Communicate, Communicate, Communicate
Communication is one of the most important factors in keeping a relationship happy and healthy. If something is bothering you, whether it’s related to your relationship or not, bring it up. Let it out, get it off your chest, and figure out a solution before it gets to the point where it causes an argument because you’re too stressed to remain calm.

A mistake a lot of couples make is thinking communication is only a priority when there is a problem. Remember to communicate every day no matter the emotion. Are you happy? Talk to your partner about what made you happy! Are you anxious? Talk about what’s making you anxious. Even if your partner doesn’t have the answer to everything, just letting it out, whether it’s positive or negative, and talking about it creates a stronger bond between you.

Set the Mood
Grab some candles, dim the lights, play some soft music, and get comfy. It’s your time to get rid of all that stress that’s been weighing you down. Put on face masks, give each other massages, pretend you’re at a spa, and relax! Just being in a relaxing environment instantly lowers your stress levels and makes loosening up much easier.

Cheer Yourself Up
Cheer yourself up! Distract yourself by something completed unrelated and sit alone for a while! You can stay in your room or on the front couch! Make yourself forget some stress in your mind and replace them with happier memories! You can tell a joke to yourself too, if you want to! If you ran out of ideas, just go to the internet. There are really funny jokes out there, for example, “Why did the gym close down? It didn’t work out.”

Take Some Time to Yourself
We often neglect personal time, especially after marriage and kids. Every little thing, even if it’s just 5 minutes here, 10 minutes there, adds up and before you know it, it’s time for bed and you still have more chores to finish! How in the world are we supposed to make time for relaxing like this?

The good news is we don’t need much time. Even just 10 minutes before bed can make a huge difference in our mood. Is there a chore that’s not necessary right now? Can you microwave a meal instead of cooking one from scratch? This time, however little it may be, can be used as “me time.” Grab your favorite dessert, put on your comfiest set of pajamas, and turn on your favorite show. It’s time for you.

Remember the previous point: communicate! Let your partner know you need some time and why you need this time. Your partner will understand as long as you communicate with them.

Revisit Happy Times
If you’re feeling a little strung up and anxious in your relationship, it might be useful to get with your partner and remember happy memories. Go through old photos, talk about moments where you laughed so hard you wanted to throw up, relive significant moments you experienced together. This reminder that bad times are temporary and good things are coming can be just what you need to overcome the feeling of stress and help you relax.

Take it a step further and use this as an opportunity to learn more about your partner. Try to remember happy moments from your childhood or before you were together. You may feel like you know everything about your partner, but it’s almost guaranteed that you’ll learn a few new stories this way. You’ll probably remember stories you had completely forgotten about!

Listen to Music
When was the last time you really sat down and listened to your favorite artist or album? Not while cleaning, not while driving, not while cooking. But just being able to sit down and listen to your favorite music. Doing this once a week or so can really help you de-stress and relax.

Exercise Together
It’s no secret exercise is beneficial and incredibly important to people’s mental health. Take some time to do a quick routine to get that blood pumping. You don’t need to spend hours at the gym or at the track. There are plenty of quick but high intensity 10 minute routines on YouTube you can play and follow along. Switch it up between a strength routine and some yoga or stretching in between. Just don’t underestimate the power of stretching! It’s tough and you will definitely break a sweat if you’re doing it right!

To add a little bit of competitive spirit, make it a competition! Did you do more pushups? Did you hold the stretch longer? Each one adds a point to your score! Winner gets a special date night planned by the other person!

Conclusion
We all get stressed from time to time. It’s OK to be stressed! Especially during these uncertain times. Take a step back, breathe, and realize things in life, between you and your partner, and everything in general will be OK. That does not mean it will be easy, but that overcoming obstacles is possible and a part of life. That being said, it does take a bit of work and effort to make it to the other side. Follow these tips and you’ll be sure to have an easier time with it!